.Editor's Details: The following is actually the text message of a character coming from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reassessing the activities of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed very much concerning specifics of the goal during the course of the month I have actually been actually right here, generally for two factors: the very first being that there has actually been very little bit of time to carry out that sort of creating, and also furthermore, since I am actually not exactly sure how relaxed I am actually sharing thoughts I share with family and friends with the rest of the globe.Effectively, definitely the world changed today. What I claim or carry out is very minor contrasted to the value of what occurred to our country today when it was attacked by ... through whom? Terrorists is all we understand, I guess. Challenging to recognize at whom to direct our rage and fear ...I had actually only ended up an amount of jobs this morning, one of the most lengthy being actually the physical exams of all crew members. In a personal conversation observing that, the flight surgeon told me they were actually having a really poor day on the ground. I had no concept ...He illustrated the situation to me as best he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually made speechless, after that terrified. My initial thought was actually that this wasn't a real discussion, that I was actually still paying attention to among my Tom Clancy strips. It only really did not seem to be possible on this scale in our nation. I could not even visualize the particulars, also before the news of further damage began coming in.Vladimir visited fairly swiftly, picking up that something extremely serious was actually being actually explained. I swayed Michael in to the component as well. They were actually additionally impressed and stunned. After our team signed off, I tried to clarify to Vladimir and also Michael as greatest I might the prospective enormity of the act of horror in downtown Manhattan as well as at the Government. They plainly comprehended and also were actually very sympathetic.I eyed the World Map on the pc to observe where over the globe we were and also discovered that our team were actually happening southeast away from Canada as well as would be actually overlooking New England in a few mins. I zipped around the station up until I discovered a window that would offer me a sight of NYC and also snatched the nearest electronic camera. It happened to become a camera, and I was actually appearing southern from the home window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke seemed to have a strange flower to it at the base of the column that was streaming south of the metropolitan area. After reviewing among the newspaper article we merely got, I believe our team were considering NY around the moment of, or even soon after, the collapse of the second tower. Just how dreadful ...I swung the video camera the whole time the East Coastline to the south to see if I could see every other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, but nothing at all showed up.It was actually quite tough to consider work after that, though we possessed some to perform, however on the following track we traversed the United States more southern. All 3 people were working one or two cams to attempt to receive views of New york city or even Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, yet no certain source might be viewed. All of it appeared unbelievable coming from two to three hundred miles away. I can not imagine the awful settings on the ground.Other than the psychological influence of our nation being actually attacked and countless our citizens as well as perhaps some pals being actually killed, the best frustrating feeling being actually where I am actually is among seclusion.Following day ... I presume the exhaustion and also emotional stress obtained the most ideal of me. I couldn't keep awake and also continue to create. Today was still difficult, yet we began acquiring more relevant information, plus our experts possessed the honor of speaking directly along with the Center Director, Roy Estess, that ensured our company that the ground teams would remain to work and also ensure our safety and security, in addition to the secure operation of the Station. We also heard from our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the partners in the Course are actually all completely committed to continuing risk-free procedures and help. These were actually never ever concerns for me. I understand all these people! The ground crews have actually been incredibly supportive, quite understanding of the influence of the information, and also have tried to be as useful as possible. They have actually all been incredibly qualified and concentrated though I can't envision the distraction of the sort of news being available in and the thought that authorities properties could be in danger. They certainly never skipped a beat, even when transferring nerve center. And a group of senior employees and also friends offered our team a pretty comprehensive rundown about what was known and what was actually being actually carried out in the government and at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually incredibly useful and also type of them to carry out in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has actually also been actually supporting as well as handy, trying to uplink news articles when our very own properties were actually unusable, and also pointing out kind phrases ...My crewmates have been fantastic, as well. They understand it is actually been a hard time for me as well as the individuals on the ground, and also they have actually attempted to become as also keeled as well as valuable as feasible. Michael even fixed me my preferred Borscht soup for dinner. And they give me plenty of space to presume when I needed it. They are incredibly thoughtful and also naturally outraged at whoever would do this.I know so many individuals in Washington, a lot of people who travel to DC as well as New York City, a lot of who are aviators, that I experienced sure I will get at least a couple of items of trouble over the upcoming few times. I received the first one today when I discovered that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that reached the Government was actually Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I met Chic during the course of plebe summer months when our experts resided in the D&B all together, and our experts had bunches of classes together. I can't visualize what he should of experienced, and now I listen to that he may have risen better than our team can also think about through possibly avoiding his plane from being actually the one to attack the White Property. What a horrendous reduction, however I make sure Chic was fighting fearlessly throughout. And splits don't move the same in space ...It is actually tough to define just how it experiences to be the only United States completely off the planet each time including this. The feeling that I should be there with all of you, taking care of this, assisting somehow, is actually frustrating. I understand that our team get on the limit (or even beyond) of a terrible shift in the past history of the globe. Several traits will certainly never coincide once again after September 11, 2001. Not only for the 1000s and also hundreds of people straight affected through these ghastly actions of violence, yet possibly for everybody. Our team will certainly locate ourselves experiencing in different ways regarding loads of factors, including possibly space expedition, however.It is actually horrendous to find smoke pouring from cuts in your own country coming from such an excellent perspective. The dichotomy of performing a space probe committed to strengthening life on the planet as well as watching life being ruined through such deliberate, terrible actions is actually jolting to the mind, regardless of that you are actually. And the expertise that every thing will be different than when we released by the opportunity our company land is actually a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our management that our company will certainly do every little thing feasible to better protect her and our families, and also to deliver compensation for what has actually been actually carried out. I have peace of mind that the really good individuals at NASA will do every little thing required to proceed our purpose safely and securely and return our team safely and securely at the correct time. As well as I skip each one of you very much. I can not be there along with you personally, and our team possess a very long way to go to complete our goal, however be actually specific that my center is with you, as well as recognize you are in my petitions.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the final letter ... Thankfully, it's been a hectic full week up here. And to show that, like our country, our company are continuing on our intended course with organization as usual (as much as achievable). Tonight the most up to date add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Compartment will definitely be actually launched coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (United States time), it will definitely dock along with our company, at a port certainly never utilized before on the nadir edge of the Service Element. This new component will give us yet another area to dock a Progress or Soyuz and also will definitely give a large airlock with 2 able to be used hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan matches, which we will certainly do a few of before our team get home.The concern just before in managing recently was insufficient updates. The trouble now is actually too much. It came all at once when email was actually recovered, and also there is actually insufficient opportunity to review all of it! Plus it's also challenging to take care of all of it simultaneously. However I value acquiring it, as well as I definitely enjoy the fantastic letters of help and also relationship I am getting.Our company are actually doing well on board, receiving our work done, and also speaking about factors. Last night our experts had a long conversation over dinner concerning the importance of these activities, the achievable actions to observe, as well as what need to be done. After dinner, Michael resolved telling me that every email he received coming from good friends in Russia mentioned primarily to tell me just how sorry they were actually that this happened, prolonging their acknowledgements, as well as asking how I was actually performing. Vladimir showed me the Russian word for "condolences" after consulting with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Area. (Both the Russian and the English phrases are actually a lot too lengthy to verbalize conveniently.) Quite types people.For the last pair of times, the Russian MCC has been good enough to broadcast live shows of broadcast news about the occasion and also affiliated stories, to be sure I was effectively notified. Every professional that has come on the line to explain a procedure or even a trouble contends some factor prolonged greetings to me along with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom informed us that because of the wedding day of remembrance in the United States, all day folks had actually been taking blooms and lining all the wall surfaces of the US embassy in Moscow, and also this evening they were actually igniting candle lights in the road outside the embassy. Just how the planet has changed.People just about everywhere appear to identify the senselessness as well as scary in this particular attack. As well as the tremendous loss. Moscow has taken care of these sort of issues in the final few years along with apartment or condo and metro bombings, so they are as distressed to remove this danger as we are actually. But all-time low series is actually that there are actually great individuals anywhere who desire to live in calmness. I read that a child inquired, "United States is therefore really good to various other countries, our team consistently aid everyone, exactly how can they dislike our team a lot?".I wish the example of teamwork and also trust fund that this space capsule plus all the people in the program show daily are going to someday influence the rest of the planet to function similarly. They must!Regrettably, we will not be flighting over the US while people are actually lighting candlesticks. Do not know if our company could possibly observe that in any case. We did, however, observe an extremely uncommon as well as lovely sight a handful of mins ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz booster. We were actually eclipsing it as well as it emerged concerning 3 minutes after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunshine struck our terminal, so it was actually still at night. It looked like a big comet with a directly, broad tail silhouetted versus the darker planet underneath. Despite some poor lighting fixtures for a while as the sunlight hit our home window at a reduced angle, I managed some online video of it as initially our experts passed the spacecraft, and afterwards enjoyed it start to catch up as it gained altitude and speed. I shot up until main engine cutoff and also enhancer splitting up occurred just like our experts came close to sunrise on the Himalayas. An extraordinary view in a remarkable full week ...Lifestyle goes on, even in space. Our experts're below to stay ... Frank.